Adhering to the always laudable ida that you should end things much as you began them, Warehouse 13 spent its penultimate episode regaling us with one of their classic Big Bad episodes where once again the world hung in the balance and only the combined might, intellect and Pete’s timely quips could save the day!
It was, in every respect, everything we have come to know and love about one of syfy’s more quirky shows, which proved that a heady brew of beguiling mythos, intelligently-written flippant humour, sharply-wrought characters and action-packed plots could not just exist but thrive in the crowded modern viewing landscape.
And given it was the second last episode, Cangku Shisi (or 倉庫十四 , Chinese for Warehouse Fourteen) wasted no time at all in putting all of these elements into play, turning Claudia’s (Allison Scagliotti) once-comatose-then-re-comatosed-now-not-comatose-sister Claire (Chryssie Whitehead) into the kinetic energy-throwing puppet of evil Valda (Mark Sheppard) who naturally enough, was going to use her to steal Warehouse 13 and transport it to China for cashed-up mysterious buyers.
Schooled under Paracelsus in an alternate timeline to see science as a worthy end that justified any and all cruel means to accomplish it, Valda once again displayed little time for social niceties, morality or trivial concerns like care and concern for your fellow human beings.
But then, what Big Bad ever has or ever will?
All he wanted, and rather single-mindedly so, was the power that comes not so much from world domination as the hoarding and control of knowledge, and an artefact-controlled Claire was his ticket to the intellectual, dictatorially-enforced big time.
On his path to getting what he wanted, and like all Big Bads he was so arrogantly consumed by the idea that no one would successfully stymy him that he actually missed the fact that Pete (Eddie McClintock), Myka (Joanne Kelly), Artie (Saul Rubinek), Jinksie (Aaron Ashmore) and of course Claudia would go all out to get Claire back and stop the Warehouse, their home, from being moved via artefacts galore halfway across the world.
In that pursuit, they both succeeded admirably, both stealing the Warehouse right back from under Valda’s sneering nose. rescuing Claire (and freeing her from the evil energy which possessed her) and sending him back in a puff of smoke to the alternate timeline from which he came (nice work grabbing Louis XIV’s Silverware Forks from Valda, Pete!) …
… and failing miserably with the episode ending with Mrs Frederic (C. C. H. Pounder) gravely informing everyone that the move to another location couldn’t be halted, setting everything up rather handily for the series finale, “Endless”.
It was quite the cliffhanger, and you can imagine dismaying to hear for the Warehouse 13 gang, who has been variously snap frozen (Artie, thanks to William Edward Parry’s Inukshuk), Borg-ified after a fashion (Claire, courtesy of Chester Moore Hall’s Achromatic Lens) and exhausted trying to stop the Warehouse from taking off from its current South Dakota location (Artie and Jinksie, who got to play with Silly String at one point).
In many ways it was business as usual for everyone, using and trying to stop artefacts form being used, depending on the situation, thwarting a Big Bad’s nefarious designs for their beloved Warehouse 13 – Artie’s desperate urgency to stop it moving to China was actually pretty moving – and throwing quips and observations around like they were narrative confetti.
For a full detailed recap, check out Nice Girls TV.
It was a fine way to almost finish things off save for the fact that the writers are persisting with their hastily contrived efforts to bring Pete and Myka together in a romantic embrace.
While I am an old-fashioned romantic from way, way back, I have always viewed the relationship between Pete and Myka as more brother and sister than lovers, and while there are no doubt people rooting for this union to take place, I would much rather the writers have held back from pursuing this late in the series.
Granted they have hinted at the URST (Unresolved Sexual Tension) between the pair here and there in seasons one through four, but it was largely left as the odd nudge, nudge here or there with nothing really done with it, and honestly that’s probably where they should have left it.
Throwing in the idea that Pete has realised he is in love with Myka gave him the chance to be at his playful, wisecracking, nervous best, and in that respect gave the fairly full steam ahead episode some much needed levity, but it also kind of distracted from the wider issue of the Warehouse leaving them all behind, bereft of home and purpose.
It makes sense I suppose that the writers want to wrap up every single last strand with the end, the sad, much lamented end but one episode away – there must be an artefact to stop this happening surely! Claudia to the database stat! – but some things are best left in the realm of “I wonder what happened to …?”
Still, it was but a minor mishap in an episode that gave us lots of artefacts action, some goofy moments, some tense moments (including proof that Garbage’s song “When I Grow Up” is the ultimate get out of trouble track) and most importantly, a classic Warehouse 13 plot where all the things we love about it came into play, making the end of this most remarkable of series even sadder than it was already was, if that is even possible.
* And here my friends for the last time ever, is the promo for an upcoming Warehouse 13 episode, series finale “Endless” …